And with 110 not out...

[And Williams runs to the breathaliser!]

There's one thing wrong then having your best player injured.

It's having him caught drink driving.

And there's one thing worse than that...

[Memories... light the corners of my mind...]

And that thing is when your team gets smacked by a cricket score over two weeks.

In the past two weeks last years premiers - that's right ten months ago they won the bloody thing - have been smacked by over 50 points each match.

If it were a score card it would be Parramatta-Wests 110 defeated Bulldogs 6.

Six? Six!

That's right, in 160 minutes of football the Bulldogs have scored one try and one goal.

But let's rewind a bit to tonight's match.

Seven minutes into the game the Doggies had the majority of the ball and it was down the Tigers' end of the field. Canterbury gets a penalty in front of the sticks.

Put yourself in the boots of one Andrew Ryan - apparently the best man for the job for the captain - he decides that "hey we can't score a try - so let's take two points".

Stand-in fullback Luke Young kicks the goal and we're up by two.

Fast forward to 73 minutes later and that's the only points that they scored - the Tiges got 54.

[Former Panther Paul Whatuira made the right choice going from out west Penrith) to Wests!]

So EQ, why are you crying about the Dogs losing again? Surely, you must be used to it by now...

Well no - I'm not and no Bulldogs fan should ever sit in their seat and smoke their pipe like nothing is wrong!

Mathematically there is a chance they could get in there, but it's too bad - we don't deserve it.

In the meanwhile - go the Jets in reserve grade!

When EQ gets angry...

[I'm excited! (But not anymore) ]

People, I'm angry. Some fucking thugs have gone and blackened the name of the Bulldogs.

The Bulldogs football club has not only gotten pissed off at the idiots who did this but have wrecked the fun for everyone else as well - http://www.bulldogs.com.au/dogbites.asp?ID=2216&SN=1

So what have I done? I wrote them a letter - I wonder if it will get on their website.
If not it will be here - for eternity.

[The days of old - when Bulldogs fans weren't persecuted!]

Dear Bulldogs,

I am writing about the measures you have taken to discourage anti-social behaviour at Bulldogs matches.

I have been a Bulldogs fan all of my 24 years of my life and I personally feel disgusted that the Canterbury-Bankstown Bulldogs have done this to your loyal supporters, restricting the fanfare of musical instruments that brings a unique spirit to Bulldogs matches.

If you feel there is going to be bombs in fan's drums - search them.

The removal of allowing larger banners and flags into the home grounds will erode fan support and the fans that have spent many hours showing their support for the club.

If you feel there is going to be bombs in fan's banners - search them.

Also, how is having reserved seating going to help anyone but the Bulldogs' pockets? People move seats if there is no-one sitting in front of them so they can get a better view of the game because as we all know Telstra Stadium and the Sydney Showground aren't world renowned as the best grounds to watch Rugby League.

So perhaps this all comes down to money. There will definitely be less people going to the games because of this measure - we don't all want an automatic increase in the costs to go to the game. Of those who do go they will be spending a lot more on attending but can't bring their banners
or large flags so that means more money spent on official Bulldogs products.

I may choose to go to away games now, but the above measures treat all Bulldogs supporters in contempt and if they continue will only make sure that the richest of Bulldogs supporters can attend matches and anyone who does not sit and clap only will be removed from the ground.

Rugby League is a working class game with working class values of standing up, cheering, booing the opposition - but all these initiatives do is turn it into a Rugby Union game.

I have never been to a Rugby Union game - but I'm sure I wouldn't be treated like a criminal by being a fan of a Union team.

This is just a lazy approach from a stadium that should be more proactive in fixing the problem instead of treating everyone negatively.

Remember the law is you are innocent until proven guilty - not the other way around.

On the ropes

[Come on down!]

Yep, that's Larry Emdur. He used to host a show called Double Dare. One of it's catchphrases were "physical challenge".

Why am I spouting out this mindless dribble? Well, it does have a point.

While EelBoy and I were out and about on the North Side of the
Parramatta River today after going on the Mortlake Ferry, there was
this rope structure which you could climb on in a playground at this
park.

Basically, EelBoy asked me to climb it. Now it wasn't your standard
rope ladder thing. No, this was something altogether more difficult and
annoying. Kinda like a Celine Dion song.

[My heart will go on.]

Is it funny to fall down from a height and injure your arm and knee?
Some would agree. EelBoy said he would love it to be on Funniest Home
Videos.

I think we'll be seeing a porn video with him in it on there before we'll be seeing something with me on there.

So what's the moral to the story? Don't do a dare? Well that can't be
right. I think that I shall take caution when it comes to climbing
things. Especially Kirstie Alley.

[But I still haven't found what I'm looking for.]

I've been getting flack lately from the ladies for me saying that I have closed up shop on looking for a chick.

Nah, that isn't right. Did I really say that? No, I meant that I am not looking for love - but love is alright to look for me.

When love comes to town I'm gonna jump that train. When love comes to
town I'm gonna catch that flame. Maybe I was wrong to ever let you
down. But I did what I did before love came to town.

Tomorrow night is Origin Two and you'd never guess who I'm picking.
While I won't be at Stadium Australia for the big one, I will be
watching it on Channel Nine with the commentary turned way down and Roy
& HG doing the call on Triple J. I recommend listening to the
fellas because they are better than the Channel 9 lot.

It's a shame I do miss their show on Friday nights on the ABC because
it's during the footy coverage. Sure, I could tape it - but I always
forget. One day I'll see their new show on the ABC.