A decade in review

A friend (and countless lists) have inspired me to blog. Since I haven't blogged in a while, (being busy with doing two TAFE courses) there is a lot to blog about, or you'd think there would be? Anyways, here is my look back at the year, and decade that was.

Living out of home can suck

Due to circumstances outside my control I found myself being a transient in this great city, moving from suburb to suburb (at least once a year on average) during the majority of the decade. Living with various strange individuals, cooking spag bol with spam (it tasted awful) and having people fuck in your room (other than you) can be rather unsettling. On the other hand, when I was living by myself I had some great times. But then I lost my job. And then I moved back home.

Living at home can suck too

So yes, I lose my job, have bugger all money, move back home. Did I hear the sound of a million women's legs closing? I thought I did. There is nothing worse than living at home, no job and no car. Or quoting Young MC "Got no money and you got no car. Then you've got no woman and there you are".

Women

I wonder why I bothered to put this paragraph in, but yes, this decade did have a bit more action in that department than the decades preceeding it. But still, in the end I am no better off than I am when I started the noughties, so that makes this a dead rubber! So, why am I in this situation where I have no lady friend to speak of? One theory for me (coming from the 40 year old virgin) is that I have to stop putting the pussy on a pedestal. I treat these ladies with too much respect, too much planning, etc and that I need to just take risks.

Being selfish

Wow, these are kinda falling into each other these things. My mentor has recently told me to be more selfish (and take risks). This decade I spent the majority of it helping family in one way or another (either me being a live in maid, or someone living in my flat) and due to being unselfish, I have lost opportunities that could have benefitted me somehow. Or as one teacher said this year, "Opportunity cost".

To dream the impossible dream

So, this time 10 years ago my dream was to be on radio as a DJ. Nothing much has changed. The other day though, when trying to do a demo for radio, I was doing a demo as a "time and temp" announcer. My radio teacher told me that perhaps being a DJ wasn't for me. I spoke to a mate and she said that she had never imagined me to be a time and temp DJ. Neither had I. So, maybe my demo should be different to being Mr Jukebox. I had always imagined myself as someone who would be able to use satire and comedy to entertain. Someone like Vic Davies, Shaun Micallef or David Mitchell.

Happiness

Over the ten years I'd been looking for happiness, but first I had to define what happiness was. What makes me happy? Well, the last time I was happy this year was when I went overseas and spent a few weeks with my (ex) lady friend across the sea. Upon returning back I thought that that was a place where I could be happy. But, instead, I have been told not to come back. Here I was thinking that NZ was a nice place where you're not judged and people are even nicer than Australia, but I guess I was wrong. So, the search for happiness continues it seems.

What to do?

So, with all that happening, what do I do? I have some ideas I might develop, I've got stuff to do before I start my Business degree in March, so I will be giving it a red hot go.

Memories

['Thanks for the memories, Fall Out Boy. Or is that Thnks fr th Mmrs?]

The other day I got the shock of my life when as I was cleaning up my room I found an old home video (with no label on it other than a video camera tag on it).

No, it wasn't a video of my parents having sex or anything like that, it was a Christmas video from 10 years ago.

You might ask "what is so shocking about that"? Since the last century our family group has receeded due to divorce and death and in some cases, selfishness.

When it comes to a genuine big family Christmas: that was one of, if not, the last.

On the ABC and SBS when they show old footage they have a warning for Aboriginal viewers that people who have passed on may appear on the screen.

Since this was a home video it didn't have that warning, so there before me lay the images of ghosts.

And yes, I was scared of these ghosts that lurked in the back of my mind for days to come.

Maybe I'm more Aboriginal than I thought perhaps?

But what I wonder is what happens to the memories of these people: once they have left our life one way or another.

Why do these memories fade? Is it that we choose to forget bacause of what happens that ceases for them to be in our life? Does our brain only hold enough memories, meaning that we will lose the cherished moments of the past?

And when they do come back to the front of the mind - why do they hold our heart and mind hostage in such a way?

I know one thing - I won't be watching that video for a while now.

Maybe another ten years.

Three out of three will be great

[Hazem kicking the goal to get the NRL record]

Everyone has goals in life – I have three things I need to be successful in my eyes.

Sure, the approval of my father would come in close fourth but there are three things that if all the stars are aligned and those things happened at once would be bloody awesome.

One: be happy at home.

Have a nice place to live in. Somewhere I can bring mates over, make a noise. Who cares? I can play that Meat Loaf CD as loud as I want. I can sing Take On Me on Sing Star all night if I want to.

Two: be happy at work

A job where I go to work and I’m happy to be there. The old saying goes that if you’re happy at work – it’s not really work is it? Well I’d love to be in that situation again. There’s only one time when I was truly happy at work and where I left there on great terms. Everywhere else has been average in one way or another.

Three: be happy in my heart.

To have a girlfriend/wife/whatever and be so damn happy that all my happiness is just shining everywhere to see.

I’ve had two of the three (home/work) but never three. Right now I have none.

With nine more months of TAFE, I hope to get a job in radio early next year and then have my own place in the country and we’ll see what happens from there. A lot of planning and procrastination has gotten me to where I am right now. I guess we’ll see what happens.

Mr Rudd wants me to spend!

[it must be funny (and partially nude) in a rich man's world]

Today I received from Julia Gillard telling me that I will receive $950 rather soon.

I felt like writing back to her “thanks love. Usually I’m paying women money, but this is a first – it’s the other way around” but thought like a cork board in the hallway at TAFE, that would be rather tacky.

But yes, I will be getting almost one thousand dollars to spend as my heart desires.

Mr Rudd says “spend spend spend”! My mind says “save save save”!

Perhaps it is the doctrine of my Dad who lived through Depression version 1.0 and never bought a thing in his life on credit (not even a house) instilled inside my brain thinking that I should put it away for a rainy day, but damn it – all I see is bloody clouds outside my window and what’s the matter with splashing some cash every now and then (it worked for K-Rudd, didn’t it?).

So what will I get with my hard earned hand out from Canberra? I am thinking I will get a few things I haven’t had before.

No, not a long term girlfriend – they cost more than $950.  I would like to get a Dreamtime jersey (so when I tell people I'm Aboriginal I won't need to show them my passport for them to believe me), a Bulldogs jersey and an IPhone.

I know that our esteemed PM told us to spend the money locally and that all three of the above are probably made in China, but isn't everything made in China these days?

Chicks can do it too!

Her voice might grate on you, but you’ve got to admit – Deputy Prime Minister Julia Gillard is good for Australia.

Gillard is good for the country as a role model for the women out there (even if one Coalition politician wishes to call her “deliberately barren”). There are young women who aspire to rise to the top of the heap and become Prime Minister (as Gillard was Acting PM a few months back) and seeing a fellow lady at the wheel makes women think that the world has progressed somewhat.

But Australia is behind the times. The first country to allow women to vote was New Zealand. And let’s not forget that half-woman somewhat manly creature Margaret Thatcher who ruled with an iron fist.

When it comes to sexism however, Australia is on par with the world.

Recently, The Sunday Telegraph decided to print what they thought were nude photographs of Pauline Hanson. If it were nude photos of Joe Hockey – who would have cared? Sure, it might have shocked a lot more people and had many of us fleeing towards the toilet bowls to let the technicolour yawns flow like a river, but because it’s a bloke no-one would care.

There was debate in the US about how First Lady Michelle Obama decided to show her arms (wearing a sleeveless top) in her official photograph. Once again, if she was a fella, not a dame – this would be an issue. I’m no Washington lawmaker, but I’m sure that the constitution allows people to bare arms?